This website requires certain cookies to work and uses other cookies to help you have the best experience. By visiting this website, certain cookies have already been set, which you may delete and block. By closing this message or continuing to use our site, you agree to the use of cookies. Visit our updated privacy and cookie policy to learn more.
This Website Uses Cookies
By closing this message or continuing to use our site, you agree to our cookie policy. Learn More
This website requires certain cookies to work and uses other cookies to help you have the best experience. By visiting this website, certain cookies have already been set, which you may delete and block. By closing this message or continuing to use our site, you agree to the use of cookies. Visit our updated privacy and cookie policy to learn more.
ISHN logo
search
cart
facebook twitter linkedin youtube
  • Sign In
  • Create Account
  • Sign Out
  • My Account
ISHN logo
  • Home
  • Magazine
    • Current Issue
    • Digital Editions
    • Archives
    • Buyer's Guide
    • Subscribe
  • Topics
    • Environment
    • Environmental Health and Safety
    • Government Regulations
    • Health
    • Industrial Hygiene
    • Occupational Safety
    • PPE
    • Product Case Studies
    • Psychology
    • Safety Culture
    • Training
    • Transportation Safety
    • More Topics
  • Construction
  • Oil & Gas
  • Columns
    • Editorial Comments
    • Best Practices
    • Positive Cultures
    • Training Strategies
    • Closing Time
    • FR Protection
    • Thought Leadership
  • Products
  • Conventions
    • Convention Companion
  • Multimedia
    • eBooks
    • Infographics
    • Photo Galleries
    • ISHN Podcasts
    • Your Digital Mentor Podcasts
    • Videos
    • Webinars
    • White Papers
    • ISHN YouTube Videos
  • More
    • Awards
      • 2020 Readers' Choice Awards- Submit Products
    • eNewsletters
    • Events
    • ISHN Store
    • Product Case Studies
    • Product Innovations
    • Showrooms
    • Vendor News
  • Advertise
    • Contact
Home » Blogs » Thought Leadership » A terrible toll too easily denied
Psychology / Training/Incentives

A terrible toll too easily denied

August 2, 2011
KEYWORDS accident victims / confined space / Psychological recovery
Reprints
 Yesterday I talked by phone with Ron Hayes for about 40 minutes. It had been months since we last caught up.

 Ron is always a man on the go. Especially since 1993, when his 19-year-old boy Patrick was killed, suffocated, as he cleared corn from the inside walls of a grain silo in the Florida panhandle. It was though Patrick slipped into quicksand, quicksand composed of 60 tons of corn grain.

 After Pat’s death, Ron and his wife Dot founded The F.I.G.H.T Project — Families In Grief Hold Together. Ronnie has put hundreds of thousands of miles on his cars driving days and weeks and through the nights to just about every corner of the country to meet with grieving families who have lost kin in workplace safety tragedies, or have had kin irreparable damaged. Or to give a speech, conduct training workshops, or try to teach OSHA compliance officers empathy.

 Ron talks of one man who suffered a fall at work and sustained tremendous head trauma when his skull was impaled on an iron rod. He is alive today, living in an assisted care facility. He is like a child, with the mental capacity of a five year old, according to Ron. His kids have grown into teenagers, his wife has steadied the household. But none of this he knows.

 Not every father, mother, husband, wife, child or sibling of a worker killed on the job regains their footing. Ron has counseled for almost 20 years one woman who lost her son. He talks of a man in West Virginia whose son died in the Massey mine cave-in. The father spends his days sitting on his front porch. “I can’t go back in a mine, Ronnie,” he says by phone.

 Ron is a thickly built man in his 50s, a construction contractor with a friendly, weathered face. He doles out tough love when he thinks it’s right. “You just can’t sit on your porch day after day,” he tells the miner. “What have you done for your son in the two years since he died? You’ve done nothing, right? Do something. Plant a tree in his name. Start a charity.”

 I asked Ron what he says to a victim’s kin who say, “The day my boy was killed my life ended. I have nothing to live for.”

 “Well, they’re right in a way,” he says. “Life will never, ever be the same. They have to start all over again. Learn how to do things all over again. Kind of create a new life. You never forget. You pray. You know you will see them again in heaven. That helps.”

 I asked if men and women react differently to a workplace death in the family.

 “Oh yeah,” he says. “Mommas feel like their baby’s been pulled right out of their bodies. They tend to have it rougher. Men, we bond with our children after they are born. We have a different kind of relationship. Men most likely also have to get back to their job sooner or later. That takes their mind off the loss, at least some. If you work construction or operate a crane or heavy equipment, you’ve gotta concentrate on what you’re doing or you’ll get killed on the job.”

 Ron mentions a woman in Kansas, a mother who lost her son, who spent two years in bed after his death. The woman’s own parents had to bring her meals. Slowly she recovered. Now she is back at work. She’s set up a foundation in her son’s name. It keeps her busy.

 At about the two-year mark after a death on the job the victim’s kin go either one way or the other, Ron has noticed. “I don’t know why it is, but I see it again and again. After about two years, they either start to move on or spiral down. If they spiral down it’s usually into alcohol or drugs. And they don’t come back.”

 Don’t these folks seek help, treatment, for post-traumatic stress? I asked Ron. “Sure they do. But unless you are talking to someone who has experienced the same kind of loss and pain, it only does so much good.”

 And that is why Ron Hayes keeps getting phone calls and emails from distraught, devastated families around the country. All his travels, speeches, training, and counseling have given him an amazing reach. Of course he has a Facebook page, The F.I.G.H.T. Project. And a toll free 800 number direct to his cramped office in a trailer parked in his backyard in Fairhope, Alabama, near Mobile: I-800-388-8644 code 19. His email: fightwrong@mediacombb.net

 I have heard more than once Ron describe to an audience the day his son Pat died. Each time, he tells the story like it happened yesterday.

Recent Comments

In addition to the personal hardship and loss...

No one will know the answer to this...

Bad drivers don't have to ruin your day...

Healthcare workers face a number of serious safety...

In my experience, truck drivers are treated with...

Subscribe For Free!
  • Digital Edition Subscriptions
  • ISHN eNewsletter & Other eNews Alerts
  • Online Registration
  • Subscription Customer Service

More Videos

Popular Stories

Today's News

2 young part-time UPS workers killed in California

incident investigation

How to investigate a worksite incident

ambulance

Buffalo Wild Wings manager dies after exposure to toxic cleaning product fumes

house

Potted plants are irrelevant to indoor air quality

Tesla

Report finds worker injuries are “routine” at Tesla’s Nevada plant

ISHN Readers' Choice Awards 2020 product submissions


Events

March 7, 2019

Safety and Wellness: The Combination that Drives Engagement and Profitability

On Demand Attend this webinar for the keys to success, as well as mistakes to avoid, when targeting safety and wellness with a Recognition & Reward Program.

View All Submit An Event

ISHN Podcasts


ISHN Podcasts

ISHN Magazine

ISHN1219_cover.jpg

2019 December

Among the articles in the December 2019 issue of ISHN Magazine, we have expert insight on selecting the right respirator, a link to the 2020 Buyers’ & Resource Guide, 10 safety mistakes that can land you in a courtroom, and much more.
View More Create Account
  • Resources
    • List Rental
    • Safety A-Z
    • Custom Content & Marketing Services
    • Market Research
    • Web Exclusives
    • Privacy Policy
  • Want More
    • Connect
    • Subscribe
    • Survey And Sample

Copyright ©2019. All Rights Reserved BNP Media.

Design, CMS, Hosting & Web Development :: ePublishing